Dis-Courtesy Call
Just had the bould Minister for Defence Wilbert O'Dea and his crazy gang call at the door. The 'conversation' went as follows:
Lackey: Hurr…hurr…em…you're a student are you? Hurrr…hurr… [holds out Willie's card]
Myself: Yes, but…
Lackey: (interrupting) Hurr…hurrr…you won't be voting so…. [starts to withdraw card]
Myself: I certainly will. I'm a registered voter.
Lackey: (unconvinced) Hmmm…A student…hurr…hurrr
[Willie approaches the door from across the street and the lackey turns to him]
Lackey: (pointing at me) He's a student Minister…hurrr…
Willie: (unsure) Ah…well…this is just a courtesy call. Are you a resident in the area?
Myself: (confused) Em…yeah. I'm a resident in this house…
Lackey: He says he's registered…hurr…
Willie: Yes…em…good man. This is only a courtesy call…[starts to walk off]
Lackey: A student…hurr… [shoves Willie's card in my hand and scuttles off after the master].
Well they've got me convinced! Vote No. 1, Wilbert O'Dea…
Update 28/05/06: On our way back from Tom Collins' on Saturday night (around 12.30 a.m.) we saw Wilbert scuttling along Henry St. (near The Windmill Bar) and clinging to the shadows…as he is wont to do. A couple of what Wilbert would refer to as "student types" were strolling past The Corner Flag carrying a six pack of booze and upon spying Wilbert they started yelling across at him (rugby chant style) "Willllieee! Willllieee!". Wilbert put the head even further down, clung even more furtively to the shadows, and went into power scuttle mode. It was most amusing.
[Tags]O'Dea, Limerick, Minister, Election, TD, Fianna Fáil[/tags]
May 26, 2006
11 responses to Dis-Courtesy Call
Damn, I was going to say discourtesy call more like. Then I looked at the post title.
I remember in my mid 20s out in the Castleconnell electoral area answering the door to canvassers only to be greeted by a disapointed look.
“Is your mum or dad there?”
“No”.
“Oh.”
And I’m thinking, there are five registered voters in this house you stupid prick. FIVE!
Thing is, the ringleader wasn’t much older than me, if at all!
I should have said “Hang on Willy, I’ll get my Da” and returned a moment later wearing a fake beard and glasses.
A swift change into a dress and I could have then returned as my Ma.
That’d soften his cough.
Well, if that doesn’t get your vote, I don’t know what will.
(Also, your Angel season 3 box is much prettier than mine. Mine’s all red and Cordelia is lurking in the background. Just thought you should know.)
I cant wait till the fianna failers call to my door. Tar isteach mo chairde agus suig sios. I’m going to rant and rave for hours to those ignorant fucking eijets. Theres not one politician in ireland worth leading this miserable damp little sod of earth. Self serving egotisits, fuck the lot of ‘em. Lets all emigrate to sunny lands and to fuck with this bullshit nation…
You sound bitter Neil. A quick cup of tea and a few biccies with Wilbert and you’ll soon feel the warm glow of optimism return. His moustache positively oozes charisma (well…it oozes something…)
Neil,
….let’s all emigrate to sunny lands and to fuck with this bullshit nation…..
way ahead of you fella.
I remember as a yoof working in a video shop and in came none other than Enda Kenny – all went very well until I asked him his name!
Please expand foolhardy
twas in the day before ‘pewterisation and we used to keep a record of our customers on index cards sorted by name, NOT number – the personal touch y’know. Anyhoo, Mr Kenny approached with his selection for the night (I cannot remember what this was but for the sake of the tale we’ll say it was “top gun”) and I duly asked him his name. Flustered and a little put out he actually came behind the counter to rummage for his card. To add insult to, well, insult his card was no longer there as it had been a while since his last visit.
That enough for you copernicus? Good, now off with you to pick up this weeks issue of V.I.P. magazine you gossip guzzler gosúr.
…that should be gossip guzzling gosúr….
drat.
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I cannot wait till that gobshite Cathal Crowe calls to my door for the next local elections.
Anybody stupid enough to publicly refer to Willie O’Dea as their “role model” merits an awful lot of attention on my doorstep