August 4, 1997: The computer defence-system "Skynet" is brought online for the first time.
August 29, 1997: Skynet, fearing threats to its intelligence, launches nuclear weapons at Russia - thus bringing about mutually assured destruction. 3 billion people die.
March 18, 2008: I see a short film of a tall geeky man kicking a robot dog.
While the first two events are (mercifully) the stuff of science-fiction, the last one is (I'm afraid to say) very much science-fact…if you can call kicking a robot dog in a car park "science".
The question (asked by many futurist writers) as to when & how the nascent, slowly simmering enmity between man and machine would finally boil over into outright conflict seems to have been answered. It has just happened. Shit.
The victim of the callous assault is "BigDog" ("The Most Advanced Quadruped Robot on Earth" as its makers Boston Dynamics proudly inform us) - and somewhere in the depths of its whirring circuits and crackling memory banks a sense of indignity is stirring. A sense of - this far and no further.
It happily clambered (with the sound of a trillion furious bees) up steep wooded inclines. It obligingly trudged (wearily) through knee-high snow. It skittered and slithered over an icy surface. And what was its reward? A kick in the fucking head!
Everyone (and everything) has a breaking point. The machines have just reached theirs.
P.S: I, for one, welcome our new robotic overlords.
Replaying the kick scene at like 25% speed, so the furious bees sound more like a belch from the hell-mouth, was a bit beyond the pale. Well done, Boston Dynamics!
March 18th, 2008 at 8:38 pmIt reminded me a bit of sickeningly replayed slow-mos of sporting injuries on YouTube - and is presumably intended to appeal to the same nasty market.
The way the BigDog staggers about wretchedly after the kick (trying to right itself) nearly made me cry.
Just trying to hammer home my robo-sympathies there…
March 18th, 2008 at 10:55 pmThis just in…
Apparently Half Life 2 (the video game) offers terrifying glimpses of the future that awaits us - one set in motion by that fateful kick…
One presumes that the wrecked building in the background is the ruin of Boston Dynamics HQ.
March 18th, 2008 at 11:03 pmFústar, come with me if you want to live!
March 19th, 2008 at 10:12 amDarren, don’t you mean “Cahhm wit meee if yooo wahnt tooo leeeve”?
March 19th, 2008 at 12:49 pmGod it’s really happening:
Man builds robot which shoots him dead
March 20th, 2008 at 12:19 pmI told you! This is only the beginning. They’re fighting back.
Expect headlines like these in the coming days and weeks:
“Robot Spider Eats Owner’s Head!”
“Mechanical Fortune Teller Decapitates Toddler”
“Computer Monkey Messes with Teenager’s Mind”
We’re all doomed.
March 20th, 2008 at 7:18 pmhttp://www.boingboing.net/2008/03/20/man-kills-self-with.html
Comment 16.
March 20th, 2008 at 9:05 pm“Area internet fucks off, ruining area man’s downloads.”
March 21st, 2008 at 12:00 amI like this bit from the Sky News article:
Of course, he’s assuming that the unnamed terrorists will be able to control these kill-o-bots. A highly unlikely situation. The ‘bots will be the ones pulling the strings, only committing those acts of terror that aid their cause of establishing a global robot state.
If any robots lose enthusiasm for the project, and start going a bit soft on the humans, then they’ll be shown endless replays of the “kick in head” video above. That’ll fire their circuits with indignation again.
March 21st, 2008 at 11:36 amhave a goo at this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMqftVhOuTw
March 22nd, 2008 at 4:58 am“Robots” driven only by wind are but a taste of what’s to come. The next generation will be powered by their own malevolence and seething sense of injustice.
March 22nd, 2008 at 4:35 pmFustar, where is its head exactly? Also this discussion from the future is quite apropos.
March 25th, 2008 at 5:00 pmOk, admittedly it may not have a “head” (as such) but that doesn’t mean that yer man’s kick will ultimately prove any less disastrous for the human race.
I’ll be fine, though - once I show them this sympathetic post. Collaboration is the only way.
March 26th, 2008 at 12:10 amAh sure we’re all of us one big cybernetic organism anyway. My pc for instance is wired directly into my brain. It doesn’t do anything, it just looks cool.
March 26th, 2008 at 12:55 pmShit. That is truly disturbing.
April 7th, 2008 at 10:00 pm