Posted by fústar in 
A recent discussion on the dubious "pleasures" of EU/Swiss propagandic comics set the memory banks whizzing, fizzing and grinding. Long forgotten (and eminently forgettable) examples of educational/promotional "sequential art" came popping back into the concious part of the noodle. Memories of comics that told us to do this while not doing that. Comics that cynically tried to generate & boost brand loyalty. Comics that highlighted the myriad dangers and evils loose in the cesspool of vice 'n' depravity that was the adult world. And so on…
One remembered example that immediately leapt up & out at me concerned the mis-matched conflict that raged (or, should I say, smouldered?) between evil fag-pushing super-villian Nick O'Teen and Krypton's favourite son.
Engineered by the UK's Health Education Council, and running from 1980-1982, the campaign (and basic narrative) made itself known to me through ads such as the above (planted in various mainstream comics).
The words "Free Pack" (though perhaps ill-chosen given the anti-smoking theme) seized both my attention and imagination. Back in those rain-lashed, glamour-starved & cash-strapped days we'd have gleefully accepted anything if it were given away free (Vials of anthrax; Sacks of depleted uranium; Boxes of surgical waste – it mattered not).
Choosing to ignore (as the Health Education Council themselves apparently did) the "Offer only available in the UK" warning, I giddily popped an envelope in the post and prepared myself for a 28 day wait. The day after the contents (of which I remember little) finally arrived I took them into school, dramatically produced them from my bag, and misleadingly announced to agog and hugely impressed classmates that I'd won these treasures in a competition. Compared to the lumps of coal and stale communion wafers we were accustomed to playing with these were rare & exotic wonders indeed.
What I hadn't realised (until Lew Stringer recently set me straight) was that isolated panels like the above were but the tips of the campaign's icebergs. Growing up in two (domestic) channel Ireland had deprived me of access to gems like this.
Sweet suffering Jesus! Frank "Brutal Vigilante Vengeance" Miller himself couldn't have penned a more savage tale of wildly excessive superhero intervention. A few points to consider & suck on.
1) It appears that Nick O'Teen's only villainous "power" is sly persuasiveness (unless you count chronic ill-health as a power).
2) Superman is one of the most powerful entities in the DC universe.
3) The extent to which Nick O'Teen can be considered "evil" (as stated above) is surely debatable.
4) Er…Superman appears to have just killed him. Call me a wussy old liberal hand-wringer if you wish, but lobbing someone 400 feet into the air for merely offering kids a few ciggies seems (to me) a tad on the harsh side.
5) Though Supes is clearly Krypto-American, Nick's ethnicity/nationality is a bit harder to work out. While the flaming red hair and O'Surname would seem to indicate possible Paddy-bashing, the prominent honker worryingly suggests that the Health Education Council considers The Protocols of the Elders of Zion required reading. Nick O'Teen or Nickenstein? Two birds. One stone.
Potentially racist imagery aside, it's amusing (and rather charming) to think that a cackling peddler of cigarettes could once have personified a parent's worst fears.
Suggestions for a 2008 version? While wholesome chiddlers contentedly play & frolic, a dribbling, greasy, bespectacled wretch named Pete O'Foyle leaps shrieking from the bushes. By his side is drooling, boggle-eyed sidekick – Kitty Fiddler. In Pete's hand we see a packet. A close-up reveals its contents to be, not cigarettes, but rather row upon row of tiny oozing cocks. Each one with a leering face of its own.
Call the Daily Mail and get me Clark Kent – stat!
Baltimora!
Whether a bush-dodger would make a suitable modern villain is open for debate, but regardless I’d like to see the traditional Shrub Rocketeer stereotype of the bespectacled long dirty overcoat trust-me trousers wearer dispensed with – only to be replaced with R. Kelly.
Gah! What an image!
In anecdotal West Kerry, at least, drugs – drugs! – were the bugbear du jour. K. O’Kane and the ruthless foreigners and signers-on who apparently comprise the criminal class were the ones ruining Ireland. D’ students, boss. Katy French, hi. The fucking country, so.
This post reminded me of Superman’s public service in another medium. In The Fiery Cross, Weyn Craig Wade recounts the story of a mole in the Ku Klux Klan who fed their passwords and plots to state attorneys and, most notably, to the writers of the Superman radio program. Supes takes on a thinly veiled KKK, and apparently it worked. You can hear more and excerpts from the radio program in this episode of This American Life. It’s a fascinating listen.
Also:
I love the “Cigarettes are bad. Send off this coupon for your free pack” bit. I hope whomever wrote that went off to a lucrative career in copywriting.
What the hell is with that animated Superman’s bobbing head?
Gobsheen, your comments are “just another form of racism!”
Is it me, or does Superman sound a bit, um, slow in that clip?
There were a ton of these educational comics released in the states. I won an anti-drug Teen Titans one in 6th grade that was actually pretty okay, as it was at least drawn by George Perez and featured everybody’s favorite ex-junkie teen hero Speedy, so it at least made more sense than if it was Robin telling poor inner city youth to ‘just say no’ before Alfred arrives in the limo to drive him back to Wayne Manor. Robin stand-in The Protector was super lame, though. I guess Aqualad was busy.
But the absolute best of them was an anti-drug Captain America comic. A guy who was a skinny, sickly loser before the government shot him up with ‘super soldier serum’ has no business telling anybody to stay away from drugs.
Aye, Supes is a full-on thicko in that clip.
That Captain America book is an exploitation classic:
http://captain-america.us/articles/anti-drug/anti_drug.htm
If cigarettes are so evil, at any age, wouldn’t Superman have been better hurling the CEOs of the cigarette companies into outer space, and demolishing their factories with his mighty fists? Or just ask them not to sell their evil product? After all, if a guy who can throw you into the Sun without effort comes into your boardroom and asks you a favour, you’d normally listen.
And if Nick O’Teen was hooked himself as a child, isn’t he a victim too? Surely Superman should help him, rather than hurling him into outer space?
This campaign raises a lot of ethical questions…
Gobsheen, Yes – that’s the terrifying thing about contemporary paedophiles. Many of them refuse to wear the traditional paedoutfit. Given this lack of clear coding it’s impossible to quickly & easily identify “small bean regarders”. Anyone could be one. Even a child!
Niall, Oh I believe the youngsters love the drugs. They go mad for them entirely. They have the cocaine for breakfast, dinner and tea. Sure doesn’t the neighbour’s young fella spread heroin on his toast every morning? The whole country’s gone mad!
Ho ho! Fabulous stuff. “Don’t do drugs kids. Drugs are bad. Look at what they did to me? Made me a beloved patriotic icon who leads the world’s coolest superhero team – The Avengers. Er…”
Demolishing factories? Attacking industrialists? Take it outside you Commie rat!
That’s more of it! Go hug a tree pinko! (Regards, Frank Miller).
One other observation. Isn’t it a bit rich of Supes to react so violently to the harmful effects of cigarettes when he himself is using his X-Ray vision so indiscriminately? I give those kids 5 years tops before life-threatening leukaemia kicks in.
Ha, I hadn’t even thought of that. Fear not, citizens! It’s only radium breath! Stand still for Superman!
Going back to Doubtful Egg’s point. Supes is clearly too much of an establishment yes-man to consider tackling this scourge at its source. The suits of Phillip Morris and co can sleep soundly in their gold beds. It’s their world that Supes is protecting after all.
I’d love to produce a strip on Nick’s backstory. How he himself (as Doubtful suggests) is but a victim of a giant cigarette-pushing corpo-machine. The tragic tale of his misdirected bitterness needs to be told. He was once a man. Like you and I.
Just an Anikin, looking for a Luke, I guess.
See? I’ve brought you round to my bleedin’ heart liberal point of view. Next up you’ll be asking whether it’s moral, or constitutional, for superpowered aliens (with their underpants outside their trousers) to dispense rough justice on the streets of Metropolis. What about due process?
Perhaps the tale of Nick’s downfall and eventual redemption, can end with him being renamed as Nick O’Rett? Or Stick O’Gum?
I have a feeling those kids were already hooked long before Nick O’Teen came on the scene. Consider: A patently disgusting man with no superhero powers comes along and makes only the vaguest and most perfunctory claims for the fags and their awesomeness. Do the kids say “intriging. tell me more”? Do they say “But aren’t they bad for you? I’d like to read a brochure”? Not a bit of it, they reach out for his proffered cig packet as soon as he stops his brief sales pitch.
These kids were hardened puffers already, and probably thought “Oh great, here comes that smelly old pervert who gives us free fags. I hope Superman doesn’t come along and ruin everything again”
Is there a comics writer post-1985 who’s asked any other question?!
I’d like to believe it but, alas, I fear that the cancer sticks have too firm a hold on him (both physically and psychologically). Like Harvey Dent his “Nick O’Teen” kiddy-corrupting persona will hide just under the surface waiting to burst forth whenever he passes through Duty Free.
If Supes had pulled that shit when I was waiting outside the off-licence for my friend with facial hair to buy me 4 cans of cider circa 1990 I’d have gone mental.
Touche! (Sorry, I’m not terribly familiar with superhero comics post-Watchmen…) You’re right, though, about Nick O’Teen’s inherent evil – you can’t trust that beady stare, the yellow teeth, that enormous phallic paedo-nose (and how did his honker get so huge? It’s normal size when he’s a child. Is it due to biologically misplaced “excitement”?)
As if that weren’t bad enough, imagine some poor 15-year-old going into a shop and forcing his wobbly voice into a basso profundo so he can buy a copy of Playboy, only to have Superman crash to the wall of the shop and give him a lecture on “going blind”.
I remember crushing a pack of me dads Benson & Hedges after seeing that advert only to be swiftly smacked around the head and sent down the newsagents to buy him some more. I was about 10 and he’d write me a note saying they were for him. They’d always serve me, Amazingly, given the opportunities, i have never smoked… though i do now have a £250 a week crack habit.
I went one better and burnt down our local fag-selling newsagents. The police (and my parents) were slightly miffed, but I knew I was serving a righteous cause,
Proactive vigilantism is often frowned upon…as superheroes themselves well know. I still beat up any kids I see smoking,