Update 23/01/08 – I've emailed a few people who've shown (or casually expressed) interest in FIZZOO! to discuss format, structure, page & word count etc. If anyone else fancies getting involved please email me (or leave a comment below) and I'll forward details on to you. Remember, it's very much an amateur exercise. So come one, come alll.

A new year. A new project.

After sampling anew the girls' comic delights that have been on show here o'er the last few months, Tuppenceworth's luverly Simon McGarr (a recent McDaddy) mailed me with a proposal.

Like me he grew up supplementing his regular comics intake with surreptitious dips into the wonderful worlds of Bunty, Misty, Mandy et al. These dips have left lasting impressions – ensuring that he and I remain committed fans of the "girl comic" and all its conventions.

And so…after some thought (about 10 minutes' worth) we've decided to create FIZZOO! A Girls' Comic…by Boys (and maybe some girls).¹

Fizoo! will (when/if it gets going) be hosted online here, feature 1-2 page collaborations between interested writers and artists, and attempt to offer askew (or even twisted) takes on such girls' comic staples as…gothic horror, schoolgirl misery, orphans, ponies, supernatural companions etc., etc.

Such a venture does, of course, run the risk of wandering into territory covered ad nauseam by Viz. A concerted-ish effort needs, then, to be made to avoid Viz's tried and tested goofy scatologica. In other words, don't expect to see something like…em…"Mavis McGog and her vomiting Dog". Actually, that's pretty funny…so ignore all previous remarks.

The first two stories will be tackled by Simon and myself – with art likely to be supplied by the fabulous "Q". To keep it going we're going to need fresh blood and fresher imaginations. If any of you regular (or irregular) readers fancy having a go at either d'writing or d'illustrating of a story then please leave a message below (or email me…see sidebar).

The aim is to be fairly slavishly faithful to the feel of Bunty, Mandy (et al) but with (as I said) a dirty twist or two.

Let us know what ye think.

P.S: I wrote the above after 2 pints of Guinness, 2 glasses of red wine, a brandy and a hot port…so if I gobble my gook please forgive me.

P. P. S: In other news – Greetings Earthlings has finally been updated.

1. Name subject to the whims of change. [back]

From Bunty for Girls 1983 (the contents of which this blog milked dry) we move on by moving back – ten years that is, to Mandy for Girls 1973.

While none of this volume's stories manage to scale the bonkers heights of Bunty's classic "Flights of Flopear", they do demonstrate the persistence/popularity of certain themes & scenarios – Girl with magical object ("Carol's Cauldron"), Girl with exotic animal companion ("Elsie's Elephant", "Mona's Monkey") etc.

Also present and correct is the kind of single concept tale that Viz once routinely parodied – "Late Kate"…a high-larious narrative about the girl who's "Never on Time!" (plenty of scope for development there).

None of the above, however, are to be the main focus of today. Instead I'd like to record for posterity a story so spectacularly ill-conceived (and offensive) that it simply leaps from the page demanding to be critiqued. Here's a portion of panel one:

A young (somewhat overweight) girl arrives at a new boarding school with all the usual anxieties and concerns about fitting in or standing out. Are we to see a sensitively-handled yarn about bigotry and (ultimate) acceptance? Any confidence one might have about the progressiveness of the writer's agenda must be tempered by the fact that the story's title is (rather unbelievably) "Tessa Pulls Her Weight". On we go:

I think you can guess where this is leading (hint: not to hand-shakes and pledges of undying friendship)…

And so it goes. Constant bullying. Constant ridicule. Until, though she can scarcely believe it, Tessa is picked for a school sport's team. The sucker punch is duly delivered however, as a mortified Tessa realises she's been lined up to "pull her weight" in the Tug-of-War. The results are (predictably) calamitous, with Tessa's eagerness to please costing the school the competition. Cue universal scorn and derision.

Then, when all hope of acceptance seems long gone, a sea-side outing riding ponies (beside a cliff!) lurches suddenly towards tragedy. A pony bolts. Young Christine (the 4th form captain) can't control it and off it goes on a mad dash for the cliff edge. Tessa springs into action, grabbing the reins before…being dragged, sickeningly, over rocky ground. Christine is saved, but Tessa is horribly wounded, as a disturbing panel gruesomely reveals:

So what's the moral here? Well, since it is (presumably) Tessa's weight that prevents the pony from flinging itself (and Christine) into the sea, one might imagine that it's a muddled message about how everyone can make a difference (using those "talents" peculiar to themselves). Or how "Bravery and selflessness are not the preserve of the conventionally good-looking".

At the very least you'd expect Tessa's bullying class-mates to be whistling a different tune. As she arrives back from a five-month stay in hospital it seems that a new attitude is, indeed, in the air:

The ambulance door opens to reveal…a denouement of flabbergasting nastiness!

Splutter! A cynical and cowardly retreat by the Mandy hacks. The solution to bullying by body fascists is, it seems, to get dragged behind a horse, suffer terrible injuries, and spend 5 months at death's door in hospital. It might sound drastic girls, but at least you'll be skinny and popular!