One remembered example that immediately leapt up & out at me concerned the mis-matched conflict that raged (or, should I say, smouldered?) between evil fag-pushing super-villian Nick O'Teen and Krypton's favourite son.

Engineered by the UK's Health Education Council, and running from 1980-1982, the campaign (and basic narrative) made itself known to me through ads such as the above (planted in various mainstream comics).

The words "Free Pack" (though perhaps ill-chosen given the anti-smoking theme) seized both my attention and imagination. Back in those rain-lashed, glamour-starved & cash-strapped days we'd have gleefully accepted anything if it were given away free (Vials of anthrax; Sacks of depleted uranium; Boxes of surgical waste – it mattered not).

Choosing to ignore (as the Health Education Council themselves apparently did) the "Offer only available in the UK" warning, I giddily popped an envelope in the post and prepared myself for a 28 day wait. The day after the contents (of which I remember little) finally arrived I took them into school, dramatically produced them from my bag, and misleadingly announced to agog and hugely impressed classmates that I'd won these treasures in a competition. Compared to the lumps of coal and stale communion wafers we were accustomed to playing with these were rare & exotic wonders indeed.

What I hadn't realised (until Lew Stringer recently set me straight) was that isolated panels like the above were but the tips of the campaign's icebergs. Growing up in two (domestic) channel Ireland had deprived me of access to gems like this.

Sweet suffering Jesus! Frank "Brutal Vigilante Vengeance" Miller himself couldn't have penned a more savage tale of wildly excessive superhero intervention. A few points to consider & suck on.

1) It appears that Nick O'Teen's only villainous "power" is sly persuasiveness (unless you count chronic ill-health as a power).

2) Superman is one of the most powerful entities in the DC universe.

3) The extent to which Nick O'Teen can be considered "evil" (as stated above) is surely debatable.

4) Er…Superman appears to have just killed him. Call me a wussy old liberal hand-wringer if you wish, but lobbing someone 400 feet into the air for merely offering kids a few ciggies seems (to me) a tad on the harsh side.

5) Though Supes is clearly Krypto-American, Nick's ethnicity/nationality is a bit harder to work out. While the flaming red hair and O'Surname would seem to indicate possible Paddy-bashing, the prominent honker worryingly suggests that the Health Education Council considers The Protocols of the Elders of Zion required reading. Nick O'Teen or Nickenstein? Two birds. One stone.

Potentially racist imagery aside, it's amusing (and rather charming) to think that a cackling peddler of cigarettes could once have personified a parent's worst fears.

Suggestions for a 2008 version? While wholesome chiddlers contentedly play & frolic, a dribbling, greasy, bespectacled wretch named Pete O'Foyle leaps shrieking from the bushes. By his side is drooling, boggle-eyed sidekick – Kitty Fiddler. In Pete's hand we see a packet. A close-up reveals its contents to be, not cigarettes, but rather row upon row of tiny oozing cocks. Each one with a leering face of its own.

Call the Daily Mail and get me Clark Kent – stat!